The Ark Park . . . Disney It Ain't!

Nothing surprising, little kennie ham is 'restructuring' his ticket prices, well that's not totally true.  He's raising the Adult prices, lower the Kids prices, and eliminating Group Discounts.  I am sure the net plan is to see a bump in revenue overall.  After all, what business lowers prices to make less money.

My guess is the group discounts weren't bringing in many groups, so eliminating them probably doesn't affect much.  If they were a cash cow, he would probably be keeping them to entice more groups visits.  But since kids rarely travel alone, you know every child is accompanied by at least one adult, that change should be more profitable, and we know kennie is all about profit.

But what cracked me up is little kennie comparing his ministries to Disney World:

It's not just a dollars comparison, here is a quote:

"Many of our visitors have told me that the quality of our Christian-themed attractions exceeds what they’ve experienced at the Disney parks, Universal Studios, and the Smithsonian museums."

I would like to see what context of the word 'quality' his 'Many visitors' were using.  If they were talking about entertainment quality, I doubt there is a valid qualitative or quantitative comparison with anything other than another religious ministry.  If they are talking about a construction quality as in how well little kennie's exhibit creators did against Disney and others, he might have a point.  He did spend lots of money to make sure the quality of the construction isn't as cheesy as say a roadside attraction in Roswell:

Little kennie's mock-ups are well done.  If that's the quality he's talking about, he might have a point.  Of course if you are talking any other quality, he tends to fall short.  With kennie, the cheesiness isn't in the construction, but in the message.  It's not a Biblical message, but the Bible according to little kennie ham, two very different things.

Here is another quote:

"Disney’s parks and AiG’s attractions are, in a sense, competing for a family’s time for vacation, offering the best possible quality in all they and we do. However, you can spend many hours waiting in long lines for short rides at amusement parks. At our Ark and museum, however, you can easily spend a full day or two at each location, experiencing edu-tainment all day and rarely standing in a long line."

While there is probably competition for the same vacation budget, in the terms and money and time, does little kennie really think his ministries offer the same quality as an entertainment location as Disney, Universal, or even the Smithsonian?  His only criteria seems to be 'standing in line'.  Well based on that, maybe -- if that is one of the things people base their vacations on being in lines.  But do you really use that when comparing vacation options?

No, the lack of 'standing in line' tells me two things.  First of all, the massive crowds kennie kept predicting have not materialized.  Therefore there is no reason to wait in a line because no one is queuing up.  The second thing is why do people stand in line anyway?  They anticipate something worthwhile for their small investment in time.  So what that tells me is that little kennie's exhibits aren't worth that sort of investment.

Let's compare with the Smithsonian for a moment, since kennie uses one of his selling points as 'edu-tainment'.  You remember when he tried to explain that his ministries were more educational than entertainment.  He tried that argument a couple of years back.  We discussed it here: The 'Ark Park' is not an Educational Institution! Nor is its purpose Recreational or Historical!.  Little kennie tried to claim his ministries fit an educational, recreational, or historical purpose in order to justify public schools paying for trips to the ark park.  So something like the Smithsonian, which it's wealth of educational and historical information, comparable to kennie's ministries?  Unlike kennie's Creation pseudo-museum and his ark park, the Smithsonian has a mission statement:

“For the increase and diffusion of knowledge among men.” (Smithsonian Institution Mission Statement)

Does anyone really belief that is similar in any way to kennie's mission statement?  Here, you compare them, here is kennie's:

• We proclaim the absolute truth and authority of the Bible with boldness.
• We relate the relevance of a literal Genesis to the church and the world today with creativity.
• We obey God’s call to deliver the message of the gospel, individually and collectively.

Little kennie even stated his real reason for building his pseudo-museum and ark park:

"Our real motive for building the Creation Museum, and now the Ark, can be summed up in these verses:

• Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. (Mark 16:15) Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations. (Matthew 28:19)
• But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear. (1 Peter 3:15)
• Contend earnestly for the faith. (Jude 3)
• Do business till I come. (Luke 19:13)"

It makes it hard to see much of any comparison with kennie and his ministries with any non-religious organization, be it in the entertainment industry or educational.  For further comparison, look at Disney theme park mission statement:

"We create happiness by providing the best in entertainment for people of all ages everywhere." (Disney Theme Park mission Statement)

Does it succeed?  Well I have been to Disneyland in California and Disney World in Florida with my daughters and granddaughter on multiple occasions -- the answer is an unequivocal "Yes!"  To quote my granddaughter, who had no idea we were going and was asleep in the back seat as we drove up to the entrance.  We shook her awake and she exclaimed "Best Day Ever!" before we even got in the park.

Now, if you doubt that kennie is building ministries and not theme parks, he said it himself:

"Our work at Ark Encounter is not just a job, it is also a ministry. Our employees work together as a team to serve each other to produce the best solutions for our design requirements. Our purpose through the Ark Encounter is to serve and glorify the Lord with our God-given talents with the goal of edifying believers and evangelizing the lost."

So what's the purpose in raising . . . oh, I mean re-structuring  . . . ticket prices?  Why else . . . to make more money!  No one with a working brain is going to see an honest comparison between his ministries and Disney, or any other theme park.  But kennie doesn't really care, as long as they spend more money!  If they think they are getting Disney, maybe they will spend more.

So let's do a little comparing of our own, when Disney World opened in 1971 a single day ticket was $3.50, which is the equivalent of $21.68 today.  Little kennie opened his ark park last year with ticket prices at $40 for an adult.  So his tickets started at nearly double what Disney started at when you count for inflation.  Granted Disney's price for one park for one day has topped $100 today (although you can find deals for $59), Disney has added and updated a great many attractions over the years.

Of course multi-day and annual passes have a different price structure, but in a realistic comparison just based on prices, little kennie comes up short no matter how you want to look at it.  I mean, how many days do you need to go through his ark park?  I visited his Creation pseudo-museum and it didn't take very long.  And it wasn't a just walk through, you were in a line what went through in a structured way to tell the story little kennie wanted to tell in the way kennie wanted to tell it.  Your pace was the pace of the line, not your own.  My guess it would have taken even less time, remember I described it as more a carnival ride than a museum visit.

So, my advice to any one planning a vacation.  If you are looking for recreational, historical, or educational vacation, little kennie's ministries are not the way to go.  If you are looking for a religious experience, I would recommend the tour of St Patrick's Cathedral in New York City.  But if you are looking for a small laugh at the expense of your children -- tell them you are going to a place 'just like Disney' and end up at little kennie's version.  Just wait until you see the look on their faces when the truth dawns on them.

True, you won't have to wait in any lines, and that's all that's important, right?